Wow ! I'm so not excited.
Apparently Prince Harry - remember him, the ginger one ? - and his American wife are expecting another child. Whoopee ! I can hardly wait.
Yet more column inches in the American, not to say British, press, yet more chances to sell the story to whatever magazines, websites and whatever else there is these days and make oodles of cash. Pity the poor little creature that eventually pops out and has to live their life with some God-awful name dreamt up to satisfy the media and cash, hungry retinue that now surrounds the former Royals.
Truly, Harry must be the least intelligent member of the Royal family in not just living memory but almost for centuries, leaving aside any who may have been genuinely disadvantaged. He has surrendered his entire former life - military titles, patronages, regular tea with HM etc. - to live as no more than the adjunct of a publicity seeking former B-list actress whose one true desire in life is to be an A-List" celebrity".
Of course, the now effectively exiled couple will make oodles of money by hawking themselves around the United States, a nation which remains fascinated by celebrity of any sort and Royalty in particular. Any child born to the couple in the United States would be eligible to take political office and, eventually, put themselves forward as a candidate for the Presidency. There can be little doubt that any such candidacy would be on the Democratic ticket but what would the electorate make of a candidate who threatened to turn the clock back nearly 300 years ? Would Algernon Adolphus or Persephone Anastasia Cambridge, 7-greats-grandchild of the last King of America, hit the right mark ? I doubt it, but then has such doubt ever stopped anyone running for that job ? What's in a name anyway ?
So watch out kid, some abomination awaits you ! Ariana Britney Kylie Elton, or Elon Tesla Bubblewrap Moonshot Cambridge, must be possibilities. But then American Presidents have not been known for their adherence to normal naming conventions - Joseph Biden's middle name is not exactly usual at "Robinette", poor Gerald Ford was a 'Rudolph', Warren Harding suffered 'Gamaliel' and there was of course, Ulysses Simpson Grant, who may well have felt as did the recipient of the Johnny Cash song "Boy named Sue", that he had something to prove.
Anything that appeals to the masses of the day, God help you. But you will be able to claim descent from the King who gave your country its independence, albeit only after a bitter war, in the first place, and you will have the essential Irish ancestry so beloved of US Presidents through your great granny's family. What price President Elon Cambridge in 2064 ? Or President Ariana Cambridge in 2068 ?
But then wait.
Perhaps Harry isn't as naive as I think he is. Perhaps this is all part of a carefully orchestrated plot to regain the lost American colonies and capture the throne for Harry's descendants. Harry's son, or daughter, becomes US President and promotes the idea of "strengthening" the "special bond" between the USA and UK. That then develops into a movement to abolish the Presidency and accept the UK's titular Monarch as head of state; the USA gets an all powerful House of Representatives, that is moderated only by a watered-down Senate (a copy of the House of Commons / House of Lords arrangement), instead of an annoying and vacillating President. Better, or worse, still, perhaps the British might be inveigled into accepting President Cambridge as their new King or Queen, ousting Harry's brother and his line.
It starts to look possible, even attractive, from an American viewpoint. No more Donald Trump or Bill Clinton, no more Richard Nixon; at the very least, someone at the top with real experience - let's not forget that Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II has been around longer than any British Prime Minister, any US President and, frankly, most of the rest of us are likely to be. She has 70 years of experience at the highest level of government, she has met every American President since Herbert Hoover (1929 - 1933) except for Franklin Roosevelt and Lyndon Johnson, that's 13 and counting; her knowledge of world affairs over the last 80 years is unparalleled. Even once her time is up, the monarchy will continue to have a similar rein over modern affairs and will provide a steadying influence as a counter to the more extreme proclivities of "here today, gone tomorrow" politicians.
Stranger things have happened.
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